Monday, August 12, 2013

So of course I realize...

Its not September yet.
 Its only August 12. 
But freshman orientation is on Aug.19th this year(I swear it gets earlier every year).
So for me there is essentially one week of summer left. 
And with 2 ministry commitments, Monday night and Tuesday night,
 this week is going to go very fast.

So that is what gets me thinking about new beginnings.
And all of these life changes I have been going through has me thinking about new roads in my life.
This last year I seem to be standing before a fork in the road.

I can continue to do what I've been doing,
 and now with more time than I've ever had to really dive in.
 Get it really going. 
Crank out new patterns every month. 
Really use my expensive Constant Contact newsletter list on a regular basis.
This is the time I've been waiting for for so long.
But alas, as I stand here looking down the two roads,
I find that  my heart just isn't in it.

If I take the familiar turn, 
I have a big motivation problem.
I wish I could be simply motivated by money.
 But if that were true I'd be working some 9 to 5-er, and pulling in a steady income. 
Sadly, that is not what has ever gotten my juices flowing.

So I turn to the other road.
The unfamiliar road.
The road that has been there all my life, gently calling; 
but not loud enough to drown out my commitments of  family. 
Not louder than my desire to mold and nurture my 4 masterpieces; 
the ones that took me 26 years to complete.
 The ones that are almost there but not completely done.

The scary unfamiliar road that is also somehow soooo enticing.
I turn and look down, 
and I am beginning to understand what it is going to take to go down that road.
 and letting go.

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